Everybody Has a Pulse

Last year, I chose to return to undergrad for the upteenth time in order to pursue my Bachelors of Arts degree in Communication. I can now say with excitement that I am just four courses away from graduation. Last week, I turned in my final project for my Media Writing class. The project was a “feature story” that would be published in a magazine. I chose to write about the Pulse Nightclub and coming out. To memorialize the lives that were lost and directly impacted one month ago today, I have chosen to post my final project at the approximate time it all began with little editing (that’s why my citations are in APA style).

On June 12, 2016, hundreds of people filled the Pulse Nightclub, a bar that catered to the LGBTQ community. The patrons checked their worries and stressors at the door. They were there to let loose, to be among friends, and to dance the night away. Most importantly, they were there to live. Pulse wasn’t any ordinary nightclub. It was a place of empowerment, solidarity, and it was a refuge for so many people that felt the world didn’t understand them. In the early hours of that Sunday, a gunman entered Pulse armed with an AR-15 semiautomatic rifle and opened fire inside. Pulse Nightclub was the latest location of the mass shooting epidemic that has plagued the United States for the last couple of decades. 49 people would ultimately perish, with 53 more injured, becoming the deadliest shooting in American history, and the worst attack against the LGBTQ community in the United States. As the names, ages, pictures and stories of the victims began to be released, many people were drawn to the heartbreaking story of Juan Guerrero and his partner Christopher Leinonen. They were planning their dream wedding together. Ultimately, their lives were cut short, but their families knew the undying love they had for one another. Instead of the dream wedding, their families were planning a joint funeral (Merchant, Johnson & Webber, 2016). As everyone was reeling in the pain and sadness of the massacre at Pulse Nightclub, those within the LGBTQ community were having a harder time coping with the tragedy. Juan’s story resonated with so many that identify as LGBTQ. He came out of the closet to his family in recent years. He feared they wouldn’t accept him; a fear many LGBTQ individuals face everyday.

At 22 years old, Juan Guerrero had been with his partner, Christopher Leinonen, 32, for three years. Guerrero worked as a telemarketer, but had recently started taking college courses at Central Florida University. He had only recently come out to his family, fearing he wouldn’t be accepted. Not only did Juan’s family accept him, but they also revered Christopher Leinonen as a family member (Merchant, Johnson & Webber, 2016).

The fears of coming out that Juan Guerrero had were common. Sexual orientation encompasses a person’s sense of identity, which is referred to as being how an individual feels, what they call themselves, and whom they want to share their life with and have an intimate relationship (Perrin-Wallqvist & Lindblom, 2015, p 467-468). The Human Rights Campaign notes that 26 percent of LGBT youth state their biggest problems include the feeling of not being accepted by their families, trouble at school and bullying, and a fear to be out and open (HRC, 2016). Heatherington and Lavner (2008) state that when a gay, lesbian, transgender or bisexual person chooses to come out to family members, it is an important psychological decision and is a major obstacle in the mind of people that identify as LGBTQ. They often fear the negative consequences that can come from coming out to family, including being kicked out, or losing financial or emotional support from their families, and take those issues into consideration prior to and during the coming out process (as cited in Perrin-Wallqvist & Lindblom, 2015, p 468). Many of the victims at Pulse on June 12 lived with those fears.

There was a report about one victim that had not been claimed by his family. A father was so ashamed of his son’s homosexuality that he refused to claim his body. He lost his life in an unfathomable way, but his father was still too ashamed to say “He is mine,” (Keneally & Lantz, 2016). Another story that gripped national headlines was about Brenda McCool, a mother of 11 that loved to dance, especially with her gay son that she was so proud of. In an effort to save her son’s life, she shielded him from the gunfire. Brenda was a hero, and stood up to the gunmen to symbolically proclaim that “He is mine” (Summers, 2016, para 20).

 

Whether you identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, have a family member, or a friend that identifies as such, know that there is nothing wrong with being gay, nor does anything change. The lives that were lost that night are no less a person’s child than before they were brutally murdered. The coming out process isn’t a cookie cutter. While the process isn’t unique, each situation and story is unique. Coming out experiences can fall into several different categories from planned discussions to spontaneity. Coming out stories aren’t limited to the list provided here, but in part, Manning (2015) classifies coming out as “the pre-planned conversations,” “emergent conversations,” and “confrontational conversations,” (p 127 & 131). The pre-planned conversation, which is likely the most common way of coming out of the closet for an LGBTQ individual, is the conversation in which the person has made a previous conscious decision to reveal their sexual orientation. Juan Guerrero likely used this method to come out to his family. Emergent conversations occur when the topic of homosexuality come up during the natural flow of conversation, and the closeted LGBTQ individual reveals their sexuality during the evolution of this discussion. It’s common for parents to sift through their child’s belongings. Parents may feel it’s necessary to do this in order to ensure their children are not endangering themselves through the people they hang around with, that they are involved in drugs, or engaging in other illegal activity. During this process, parents may discover their children may be gay. The parents discover this through reading notes and letters, or overhearing phone conversations. In these situations, parents describe themselves as being angry, while their children feel betrayed, scared and confused (Manning, 2015, p 127 & 131). Since there are a multitude of scenarios, LGBTQ people, their friends and family experience and deal with the process in many different ways. When dealing with the realities of being LGBTQ, or having someone in your life that is, love the person, embrace them, and dance the night away with them, just as Juan and Christopher did, and just like Brenda McCool did. It’s important that their deaths are not in vain, but instead are springboards to create dialogue, and better assessments of what love, commitment and compassion truly mean.

In the end, people in the LGBTQ community only want to be accepted for who they are. Only then can lesbians, gays, bisexuals, transgenders and those they deeply love begin to cope with the realities that nothing is different. In fact, the lives of Juan Guerrero, Christopher Leinonen, Brenda McCool and the countless lives that were directly impacted by this mass shooting encapsulate that notion. The sonnet that was passionately and eloquently drafted, and spoken by Lin-Manuel Miranda during the 2016 Tony Awards reminds people that “Love is love is love is love is love is love is love cannot be killed or swept aside,” (Miranda, 2016). Love conquers hate, and no matter how hard people try, that is a constant that will never change. Love one another, embrace each other, and accept each other, because when the dust settles, that’s one of the only things that everyone truly wants.

HRC (2016). “Growing up LGBT in America,” Human Rights Campaign. Retrieved from:

http://www.hrc.org/youth-report/view-and-share-statistics#.V31BmZMrLeQ

 

Keneally, M. & Lantz, D. (2016, June 13). “Mother of Orlando Shooting Victim Makes

Emotional Plea,” ABC News Retrieved from: http://abcnews.go.com/US/mother-man-missing-orlando-club-shooting-breaks-awaits/story?id=39794076

 

Manning, J. (2015). “Communicating sexual identities: a typology of coming out,” Sexuality and

Culture 19(1). Retrieved from: http://eds.b.ebscohost.com.proxy-library.ashford.edu/eds/pdfviewer/pdfviewer?sid=8b5e899c-a41e-4ee9-aeac-c5f0b5660941%40sessionmgr107&vid=4&hid=104

 

Merchant, N., Johnson, C.K., & Webber, T. (2016, June 15). “Victim Vignettes: All remembered

for joy, love they brought,” AP The Big Story. Retrieved from: http://bigstory.ap.org/article/5fb45f7bd2564c769ff6f3692c305c44/victim-vignettes-all-described-kind-loving-full-joy

 

Miranda, L. M.[Entertainment Tonight] (2016, June 12) “Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Emotional

Tonys Acceptance Speech: ‘Love is Love’.” [Video File] Retrieved from: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUffUHGqYco.

 

Perrin-Wallqvist, R. & Lindblom, J. (2015). “Coming out as gay: a phenomenological study

about adolescents disclosing their homosexuality to their parents,” Social Behavior and Personality: An International Journal 43(3). Retrieved from: http://eds.b.ebscohost.com.proxy-library.ashford.edu/eds/pdfviewer/pdfviewer?sid=ea33bbe5-b183-436c-a921-9107fa13a5c2%40sessionmgr102&vid=3&hid=104

 

Reynolds, D. (2016). “A Father Refused to Claim Body of Pulse Victim,” The Advocate.

Retrieved from: http://www.advocate.com/families/2016/6/24/father-refused-claim-body-pulse-victim

 

Summers, C. (2016, June 21). “’She was the mom everybody wanted’: Orlando massacre survivor

breaks down in tears at funeral for his hero mother who shielded him with her body and saved his life,” Daily Mail. Retrieved from: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3652052/Orlando-massacre-survivor-breaks-tears-funeral-hero-mother-shielded-body-saved-life.html

A Place of Solidarity, Empowerment and a Place to Live

In times of hardships, tragedies and even triumphs, I find myself picking up a notepad, a drafting pencil or a paint brush to allow my creativity to flow. It’s in these moments when I find my motivation, peace and serenity. Often times, I don’t have a difficult time finding the words to say. After many tragedies, I had no shortage of words to write, but in the face of yet another national tragedy, I’ve found myself at a loss for words.

It’s been four weeks, and it is still incomprehensible to think about what happened at Pulse Nightclub in Orlando. The worst mass shooting in American history where 49 people died, and 53 others were injured. The spot was chosen because of its popularity, and its LGBTQ clientele.

This is an especially heartbreaking day for all our friends—our fellow Americans—who are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender. The shooter targeted a nightclub where people came together to be with friends, to dance and to sing, and to live. The place where they were attacked is more than a nightclub—it is a place of solidarity and empowerment where people have come together to raise awareness, to speak their minds, and to advocate for their civil rights. – President Barack Obama (June 12, 2016).

I’ve been working on what to write in the wake of the massacre, but at times I’ve been overcome with grief, sadness, and unable to conceptualize my feelings into words. I’ve wanted to write something that expresses my own feelings, advocates for awareness, and most importantly honors the victims. 

Eight years ago, my friend invited me to her 21st birthday celebration at Martha’s Vineyard, a gay bar in Springfield, Missouri. I had never been to the bar, but I had always been interested in going… as a “straight” guy, of course. While I was eager to go to Martha’s, by the time I got in there, I felt awkward, uncomfortable and out of place. Deep down inside myself, I knew the truth; I was gay, but I wasn’t ready to accept it. As the night progressed, I loosened up, and began enjoying myself. When we were getting ready to leave, my friend’s friend, who is an openly gay man, came up to me. He put his sweaty arms on my shoulders and said “I know you’re straight, but I just want you to know that you’re adorable.” I don’t know what it was in that moment; maybe he whispered a subliminal message to me – it’s OK to be yourself. I found myself at a crossroad in my life. I could wallow in my self-pity and continue lying to myself, but I didn’t want to live a lie anymore. I was sick of the battle, and I wanted to be true to myself, and the world.

Over time, going to Martha’s became somewhat of a weekly ritual for my friends and me. We went to watch drag shows, we went to drink, to dance, to have a good time, and most importantly to be with friends. One of my greatest memories at Martha’s Vineyard was New Years Eve, 2008. The year was being capped off surrounded by friends that just a year ago, I didn’t know. As the clock struck midnight, drag kings and queens got on stage as we all sang “Seasons of Love,” from Rent. In that moment, I was excited for the path my life was headed on. Everything felt right. As I look back upon my experiences at Martha’s Vineyard, I remember how comfortable I felt there. I could be myself without fear of being harassed; I met like minded people and developed a supportive network of friends.

“Seasons of Love” at Martha’s Vineyard – New Years Eve, 2008

My personal experiences and feelings aren’t unique.  In fact, they are on par with the norm. As I asked my own friends about their experiences at gay bars their descriptions were strikingly similar to my own. They expressed that they felt at “home” and like they were among “family.” Gay bars, diners, resorts, and other establishments that cater to the LGBTQ community are seen as safe havens. We don’t have to fear the harassment, discrimination, bigotry or hatred that people in the LGBTQ community are all too often faced with. Martha’s Vineyard was my respite from a world, and more importantly, a town that didn’t understand. British comedian, David Morgan said:

If you’re not gay you might not know how rare it can be to feel welcome and safe in a space. To be gunned down in one of them is horrific.

— David Morgan (@thisisdavid) June 12, 2016

People have been asking why the media and our politicians keep referring to Pulse Nightclub as a gay establishment, rather than just calling it a nightclub. Pulse is not just a nightclub, and to refer to it as such would be both disingenuous and misleading. The nightclub was not targeted simply because it was a popular bar, but because it was a popular gay bar. Whether the gunman targeted that specific location because of his religious ideologies, or his hatred for the LGBTQ community, the location was chosen because the patrons were gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, queer and straight allies.

The sobering facts that LGBTQ youth represent approximately seven percent of the youth population, but account for 40 percent of homelessness among all teenagers, and LGBT teens are four times more likely to attempt suicide, while questioning youth are three times more likely when compared to their straight counterparts are troubling, but the troubling facts do not end there. In circumstances in which LGBTQ youth are physically or verbally harassed or abused, it is reported that they are two and a half times more likely to engage in self-harming behaviors. Additionally, youth that come from unsupportive families are 8.4 times more likely to attempt suicide when compared to LGBTQ youth that report little to no family rejection.

The raw emotions those of us in the LGBTQ community are feeling understand the struggles the people at Pulse went through in everyday life. We faced the discrimination, the bigotry and the intolerance first hand, just as they did. We know the stories of the “medical experiments,” torture and death those suspected of being gay were subjected to in the concentration camps during the Holocaust that history books tend to forget. We understand the first pride march was a riot – the Stonewall Riots in 1969. We understand the arson of the UpStairs Lounge in New Orleans that killed 32 in 1973, and was the largest mass killing of LGBTQ individuals in the US prior to Pulse, was motivated by hatred. We understand that Matthew Shepard was tied to a fence, beaten and left to die, because he was gay. We understand that Lawrence King was murdered because he professed his love to a male classmate, and his educators ignored the warning signs and pointed blame at Lawrence, rather than his perpetrator. We understand that our transgender brothers and sisters are being discriminated against, abused and killed at even greater alarming rates than lesbians, gays and bisexuals, and our politicians seem preoccupied with legislating what restrooms people should use, rather than creating meaningful legislation. We understand that we couldn’t openly serve in the military until 2011, June 30, 2016 if you’re trans, or get married in all 50 states until last year and we understand the “religious freedom” laws for what they truly are. We also hear loud and clear some of the rhetoric being preached in the wake of the Orlando tragedy in the name of “God.”

While this attack has affected anyone that values freedom and human life, regardless of their sexual orientation, it’s important to realize this tragedy impacts all of us in different ways, and we mourn in different ways. We respond differently, and even have different connections to the victims and location of the attack. You might be mourning the loss of innocent lives, broken dreams, and families and friends that have to deal with the emptiness their lives now have. You may be heartbroken over the carnage that was spilled on June 12 because of hatred, intolerance and bigotry. You have every right to feel the way you do, because the people that died and the people that are dealing with the injuries and scars are ultimately a part of all of us.

As I wrote this, I felt it was important to capture voices from the LGBTQ community and beyond. I asked a couple of my straight friends for their thoughts on the attack, and this is what they had to say:

“It bothers me that a heavily armed man went into a nightclub and shot a lot of people. Those people were someone’s son or daughter. An act of hate took them away from their families. As a straight mother, I keep thinking that there are parents mourning the loss of their sons or daughters, brothers and sisters. I have a five-year-old daughter, and it scares me that she could be in the wrong place at the wrong time someday because of a hateful person with a weapon.” – Jodi

 

“It’s hard to really put into words what I’m feeling. No one deserves what happened in Orlando.I would be considered by many to be very conservative… Perhaps even a “right wing-nut” to some, but that doesn’t mean I lack compassion. I have been praying for the families of the victims, just as I do for any national tragedy. We can all unite and agree that what happened was absolutely terrible. It especially hit me when I heard he had scouted out Disney World. If he had chosen that as his target, it likely would have been the week I was there for my first Disney trip, as I was there during the Disney “Gay Days.” To think I could have been that close to a national tragedy is hard to fathom, and makes things hit a little closer to home. I have friends in the LGBT community, and to think that they could be targeted for their sexual orientation is just as tragic as Christian persecution in the Middle East*.” – Allison

While we understand and still endure the discrimination, hatred, bigotry and tragedies we have faced over the decades in the LGBTQ community, there’s still reasons to be optimistic. There’s a lot of work that still needs to be done for equality, especially for our transgender brother and sisters. We’re still going to face the bigotry and hatred that has plagued us, but we’re in a far better place today than we were even just 10 years ago. The Stonewall Inn was just designated a national historic site by President Obama and just last week, Defense Secretary Ash Carter lifted the transgender ban in the military. We may still be reeling in the pain of Orlando, and that will take time to heal, but I have hope for a better tomorrow.

“The only thing they have to look forward to is hope. And you have to give them hope. Hope for a better world, hope for a better tomorrow, hope for a better place to come to if the pressures at home are too great. Hope that all will be all right. Without hope, not only gays, but the blacks, the seniors, the handicapped, the us’es, the us’es will give up. […] And you, and you, and you, you have to give people hope.” – Harvey Milk (1978).

In November, I will cap off an epic expedition to Berlin, Barcelona, the Canary Islands, and Puerto Rico in Orlando. I planned to go to Pulse Nightclub prior to June 12, and that plan has not changed. Barbara Poma initially opened Pulse to keep her gay brother, John Poma’s heartbeat alive after he died. She and co-owner Ron Legler vow to reopen Pulse with a stronger heartbeat than ever before; a pulse strong enough to memorialize 50 lives (49 victims that died, and her brother). A good friend of mine that I met through LGBTQ advocacy often calls us a family of choice. While talking about the reopening of Pulse, Poma reiterated that when she said:

“We just welcome those families into our families. and we just have to move forward and find a way to keep our hearts beating and keep our spirit alive; and we’re not going to let somebody take this away from us.” – TODAY Interview (6/14/16)

If Pulse is reopened by November, I will go there and dance the night away. Otherwise, I will pay my respects in another way. As Barbara Poma said:

“It’s important to never let hate win.” – Today Interview (6/14/16)

Love conquers hate, because:

“We live through times when hate and fear seem stronger
We rise and fall and light from dying embers 
remembrances that hope and love last longer
And love is love is love is love 
is love is love is love is love
Cannot be killed or swept aside” – Lin-Manuel Miranda, Tony Awards (6/12/16)

 

*- I don’t want to take away from the sentiments of this comment, because it’s important, however I feel it is also important to point out that many groups of people from many different cultural groups are persecuted in unfathomable ways in parts of the Middle East.

Marriage Equality Comes to Pennsylvania

First same-sex couple to get a license in Pennsylvania – courtesy of Why Marriage Matters

Yet another example of Governor Corbett of Pennsylvania’s failed policies was at the forefront today, primary election day, 2014. Last year, 11 couples, a widow and the adult child of a same-sex couple filed a lawsuit challenging Pennsylvania’s version of the Defense of Marriage Act. In response to the lawsuit, Governor Corbett decided to spend an exorbitant amount of money defending the state’s position by hiring private attorneys when PA Attorney General Kathleen Kane refused to defend the unconstitutional law. Today, Judge John Jones, a President George W. Bush appointee deemed the Defense of Marriage Act to be unconstitutional. In part, Judge Jones wrote,

“Some of our citizens are made deeply uncomfortable by the notion of same-sex marriage. However, that same-sex marriage causes discomfort in some does not make its prohibition constitutional. Nor can past tradition trump the bedrock constitutional guarantees of due process and equal protection…

“Were that not so, ours would still be a racially segregated nation according to the now rightfully discarded doctrine of ‘separate but equal’…

In future generations the label same-sex marriage will be abandoned, to be replaced simply by marriage.”

Judge John Jones – George W. Bush appointee

It’s almost as though Judge Jones stole the words right out of my mouth. I yearn for the day when marriage is known as just marriage and not “traditional marriage,” or “gay marriage.” Marriage is such a hot button issue, because so many people have a difficult time separating a religious marriage from a civil marriage. We’re not trying to rewrite what others think their religion stands for, we are fighting tirelessly for  the recognition of civil marriage. I couldn’t be more proud of the decision Judge John Jones announced today, and quite frankly, it came as no surprise. While it’s inevitable that Governor Corbett will appeal this decision, and the decision about marriage equality will ultimately rest in the hands of the nine Supreme Court justices, we can rest assured that one day marriage equality will be a realization for all Americans and celebrate today’s major victory for the citizens of Pennsylvania.

Through my previous work with the Human Rights Campaign and Americans for Workplace Opportunity and my current work with Marriage Equality for Pennsylvania (ME4PA), I have had the distinct honor of meeting two of the plaintiffs on this case. Frita and Lynn are two average working-class people that have children of their own and are foster parents. They are the epitome of an American family. I admire these two and the many other plaintiffs in the Whitewood v. Corbett case as they are the ones spearheading the movement and paving the way for those of us unwilling or unable to fight this fight in the courtroom so that we all can have the same right to marry the person we love.

Today marks yet another day when I am proud to be a Pennsylvanian and an American. Each day we take one step closer to equality, and I cannot wait for the day when something such as marriage equality is a normal part of this country. People say our founding fathers would be rolling in their graves if they saw the decisions our courts have been making over the years, but I disagree. The genius behind the Constitution is that is a living document that evolves with society. Our own attitudes towards certain laws have changed over time and our country has to be able to make those adjustments. The Constitution makes that possible. In the words of Macklemore, no freedom until we’re all equal.

I Will Not Rejoice in the Death of They-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named

Over the last week or so, we have seen stories about one of the most hated people in America being close to death. A few days ago, that individual died. Instead of the typical condolences tweets and Facebook statuses, I saw an influx of celebrations and memes mocking their death. While I made a promise to myself when I made my blog almost a year ago now that I would not mention this individual or their cult, I have chosen to break my silence this one time to hopefully make others think.

While I did tell a few people about this individual’s passing, I did not post a celebratory status on Facebook or Twitter. I have not read the articles that are being written about this hateful person, and I won’t. I have not reblogged any memes or humor pieces that make light of their death. I won’t do these things, because I believe in dignity and respect, even when that idea is not reciprocated by others. I don’t believe in rejoicing or celebrating the death of another individual, regardless of how evil they may have been. This person and their family had no impact on me whatsoever. They do the things they do not to spread “God’s” word as they say, but to be provocative and to draw attention to themselves. While they blame everyone else except for themselves for worshipping false idols, they worship themselves. They strive on the attention we give them, and they eat it up. That’s why I don’t give them publicity, or typically pay attention to what they do. I only knew about this person’s impending and eventual death, because of “breaking news” alerts sent to my phone.

I was saddened when I saw their picture plastered on the front of CNN.com with the headline that they had died. I just wish we would spend the same energy on sharing the stories of the soldiers and other difference-makers in the world that have died. I’ve always been dumbfounded about the fascination we have with this person and their cult. This person deserves no more recognition for their death than anyone else, particularly those that die wearing the uniform of this country. It’s utterly ridiculous that we give them the time and energy that we do. Think of the possibilities if we ignored this family. What would happen if we didn’t give them publicity? What would happen if they didn’t grab headlines? They might not go away, but their egos wouldn’t be as stroked as they are today. The “power” – no matter how small it is – that they have is only further legitimized by our own allowances of following their every move.

Over the last four months, it seems like I have been to more funeral homes than I have my entire life. I have learned that it is now customary for us to donate money to charities that the person that died held near and dear to their heart. My grandfather loved animals, and after he passed away in November, people were asked to donate money to diabetes research and to a local animal shelter. I call for anyone that feels the need to honor the death of the evil individual that died last week to consider donating money to an LGBTQ charity, AIDS initiative, or a charity that supports our troops in their name. I’m sure their family will love that token of our appreciation for them far greater than any happy tweets, memes or pickets of their funeral. Once we donate to these foundations, I suggest we erase this cult from our memories and never utter the name of the “church,” or the family members’ names that belong to the cult. We have the power to strip them of any influences that they may have on society. I for one will continue to campaign against them, but doing so in productive ways, such as being involved with initiatives and organizations that advance causes I believe in. I will not stoop to their level, or play their game. I am above that and I will continue to show dignity and respect to every person, regardless of whether I agree with their stances or not. Without open, constructive dialogue, we halt progression.

(v 1.2)

Changing the Message: How Anti-LGBTQ Zealots Mask Hatred in Religious Convictions

Described as one of the worst hate crimes to be committed against an LGBTQ person in America since Matthew Shepard’s brutal murder in 1998, the slaying of 15-year-old Lawrence “Larry” King by a fellow classmate in February of 2008 has been depicted in the new HBO documentary, Valentine Road. The film weaves through the events that led up to Larry’s murder, the aftermath and the trial of his 14-year-old killer, Brandon.

Larry King

Larry was anything but an ordinary teenager. He identified as bisexual, was effeminate and enjoyed wearing women’s clothing and makeup. He was the victim of relentless bullying by his classmates. Just like any other teenager, Larry had a crush on one of his peers, Brandon. Leading up to Larry’s death, Larry harassed Brandon. He called him his love and spread rumors that they were in a relationship together. A few days before Valentine’s Day, Larry went up to Brandon while he was playing basketball with his friends and asked Brandon if he would be his valentine. In the days leading up to Larry’s death, Brandon became increasingly agitated towards Larry. On February 12, 2008, as Larry sat in his English class, he was shot at point-blank range twice in the back of his head by his crush. He succumbed to his injuries a day later.

Shockingly, several individuals interviewed in Valentine Road were unsympathetic towards Larry while they sympathized with Brandon. Two teachers said Larry wouldn’t have cross-dressed and worn makeup if he was in their classes. One teacher said she would have spanked the transgenderism right out of him, while she condoned Brandon’s interest in white supremacy. Another teacher said Larry would still be alive if she was his teacher. She would have made him check his cross-dressing at the classroom door.

Three jurors that served on Brandon’s 2011 mistrial were shown sitting around a kitchen table portraying Larry as Brandon’s aggressor, not Brandon’s victim. One of them said that Brandon was, “Just solving a problem,” in justifying Larry’s murder. After Brandon accepted a plea deal that put him in prison for 21 years, the women talked with cameras outside the courthouse saying his sentence was too long because he was just a kid, had no prior criminal history and “It wasn’t like he kidnapped anyone.” Brandon may not have kidnapped Larry, but he did rob Larry of his right to life.

Matthew Shepard

When we hear about murders like Larry King’s and Matthew Shepard’s, suicides that result from anti-gay torment, and people being bullied for being LGBTQ, we often find ourselves seeking answers as to why these things are happening. The answer is quite simple; it’s the message that gay people are morally and spiritually repugnant. In the wake of Larry’s murder, Ellen Degeneres made an emotional plea to her audience. Ellen said, “Somewhere along the line, Brandon learned that it was so threatening, so awful and so horrific that Larry wanted to be his valentine that killing him seemed like the right thing to do and when the message out there is so horrible that being gay can get you killed, we need to change the message.”

With politicians, religious leaders and pundits raising the Bible to divine status, the environment they have created has resulted in society believing they are the moral authority over the world – as though they speak for God. This has seemingly resulted in the Bible being used as a weapon of power to oppress others. The Church’s oppression has not been limited to the secular world, but has even been used as a weapon to oppress its own faithful. Not only have these people used the Bible to oppress, they have used it to justify discrimination against the LGBTQ community under civil law.

Many lawmakers and religious leaders encourage the families of LGBTQ people to exercise “tough love” with a “healthy detachment.” In the documentary, For the Bible Tells Me So, Mary Lou Wallner tells the story about how her daughter, Anna committed suicide after Mary Lou exercised a tough love mentality. A few months before her death, Anna told Mary Lou that she had, “Done colossal damage to her soul with her shaming words.” The shaming words Anna spoke of were the words Mary Lou’s church had taught her.

Mary Lou Wallner’s story in For the Bible Tells Me So:

Not unlike Mary Lou Wallner’s story, the relationship between Mary Griffith and her son, Bobby is depicted in the true story, Prayers for Bobby. Mary told Bobby that she wouldn’t have a gay son and if he prayed and dedicated his life to the Bible that God would deliver Bobby from his abomination. Bobby couldn’t deal with his mother’s ignorance. He jumped off a bridge, killing himself instantly.

Trailer of Prayers for Bobby:

In both Mary Lou and Mary’s situations, they both began seeing the Bible in a different and more loving light after their tragedies. Unfortunately for them, their change of hearts were too late for Bobby and Anna. Instead of living a life of regret, Mary and Mary Lou wouldn’t let their children’s suicides be in vain. They both became pioneers in changing attitudes about the relationship between sexuality and Christianity. On her non-profit organization’s web site, Mary Lou Wallner quotes a Bible verse we all should live by:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. – 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV).

While Mary Lou Wallner and Mary Griffith discovered the errors of their ways after it was too late, politicians and religious leaders continue to lead families down the road Mary Lou and Mary once found themselves down. As long as these politicians and religious leaders continue to dupe society into oppressing their children, their colleagues and their peers while making society believe the gay community is destroying America and asking for the wrath of a vengeful God, then the message we send Matthew’s murderers, Larry’s killer and all the bullies out there is that what they’re doing is justified.  In reality, it’s the anti-gay crowd that is destroying this country, ripping families apart and leading the charge for bullying, violence and self-injury.

During the height of the news media covering teenage suicides resulting from incessant demeaning bullying in 2010, the It Gets Better Project was launched. Kathy Griffin participated in the video campaign by providing her own video. In part, Griffin said, “The politicians, so-called religious leaders and pundits who have made careers out of saying being gay is wrong, or immoral, or that gays are somehow less than, all have blood on their hands.”

Kathy Griffin’s full It Gets Better video:

I’m uncertain as to whether neoconservative radio talk show host and FOX News contributor, Sandy Rios saw Kathy Griffin’s video, but she was recently caught trying to wash the blood off the hands of political pundits and religious leaders that have profited from destroying families. On the eve of the 15-year commemoration of Matthew Shepard’s death, Rios took the stage at the Family Research Council’s annual “Values Voter Summit,” last weekend to introduce a new theory into Matthew Shepard’s murder. According to her, the gay community and liberals conspired to savagely murder Matthew. The LGBTQ community and liberals needed a martyr to gain sympathy from society. By framing two anti-gay killers, the conspirators succeeded in faking-out Americans, thus garnering unabashed support from society, which led to the advances in equality we have seen over the years. As we all know, Matthew Shepard didn’t die as a result of some grand conspiracy. He was tortured and murdered because at some point, Matthew’s perpetrators learned that he was a threat. Matthew’s mother, Judy Shepard once said, “When you call someone a ‘fag,’ it identifies them with a group, a group that in today’s climate is open to harassment. So by calling someone a ‘fag,’ you are giving yourself and the people around you the license to either damage this individual verbally or physically.”

In one of the most poignant moments in Prayers for Bobby, Mary Griffith’s former pastor spoke during a city council meeting about how the LGBTQ community is spitting in the face of decency and morality. Afterwards, Mary took the podium. She talked candidly about how she believed that homosexuality was a sin and that homosexuals deserved to live an eternity in Hell. Her opening remarks were met with great enthusiasm and praise. As Mary continued speaking, she admitted that she did everything in her power to help cure Bobby of his sickness only to learn that everything she was taught was bigotry and dehumanizing slander. Fighting back her tears, Mary said that Bobby’s suicide was a direct result of his parents’ ignorance and fear. Her church had taught her to act as she did when Bobby was alive. She encouraged church members and leaders to reconsider how they broached the topic of homosexuality, reminding them that children were listening. Mary was met with a roaring standing ovation after her remarks.

Mary Griffith’s speech at the city council meeting in Prayers for Bobby:

Families, bullies, Matthew’s murdereres, the teachers in Larry’s school, Brandon and his jurors weren’t born with the ignorance and hatred they espoused. They were taught their beliefs from powerful forces that represent us in government and preach from a pulpit each week claiming to speak for God. I may not be religious, but my knowledge of the Bible is far greater than the average joe’s understanding of it. I must say, I remember a very different God from the God described by those that use religion as a means to promote their own agendas for personal gain while claiming to be God’s speakers.

As Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. famously said, he had a dream that one day people would be judged not by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character, I yearn for the day when individuals aren’t judged based upon who they love, but by who they are as a person.  We are all different in many different ways, but one commonality we share with each other is that we’re all human. Each of us deserve dignity and respect. It’s time for people to stop using a weapon of oppression to rationalize discrimination and bigotry and use the Bible as a tool to embrace diversity, love, acceptance and compassion for one another, just as the book they hide behind commands us to do.

Remembrance

New York City on March 11, 2002

September 11 impacted all of us in a very raw and emotional way. To be quite honest, we as Americans thought we were untouchable. We didn’t feel like an event such as 9/11 could ever occur on American soil. When the events of September 11 occurred, and we saw the magnitude of the terrorist attacks, it hit us harder than if we were used to such attacks happening on American soil. I can still remember the details of that day – where I was, what I was doing and how the rest of that day paned out. It was a dark day in history and really sparked my personal mantra of  ’om mani padme hum,’ in English terms that simply means compassion. Spreading love is the only way we’ll ever stomp out hate. I was a senior in high school when Al Qaeda attacked the United States of America. I was glued to the coverage on TV, I read every newspaper and magazine I could and I typically commemorate 9/11 in some way every year. I had wanted to visit Ground Zero since it was opened to the public, several years ago. My goal of visiting Ground Zero became a reality earlier this year when I made a trip to New York City during a trip that encompassed visiting six different countries and territories. My visit came exactly 11 1/2 years after that fateful day on September 11, 2001.

Footprint of the South Tower

Before this moment, everything I had seen of the 9/11 tragedy was footage on the TV, photographs and Hollywood movies. Being at the site of such a horrific event in American history made it all become real. Real people lost their lives. Real people were injured. Real buildings collapsed. Everything was real. I wasn’t filled with anger or vengeance. I strangely felt a sense of calm and peace. The atmosphere was solemn, but anger had no place at this memorial. The World Trade Center memorial wasn’t about the hijackers and the terrorists. It was about the victims, remembrance and resilience. Ground Zero is still a construction site as we build bigger and stronger buildings near the original World Trade Center buildings, so the entire picture of what the new World Trade Center is going to be isn’t completely there yet. I think the designers of the memorial hit the nail on the head. They captured the remembrance of ALL the victims from September 11 and the February 26, 1993 bombing of the World Trade Center. The designers didn’t just memorialize the victims of the bombing, the North Tower, the South Tower, Flight 11 and Flight 175, but they also etched into the memorial the victims of the Pentagon, Flight 77 and Flight 93.

Footprint of the North Tower

I rubbed my hand over the names as I passed them and often paused to reflect about so many lives that were taken all too soon. Some lives didn’t even get to experience a moment of life outside their mother’s wombs. The memorial brings life into perspective and while I still struggle with this, it reminds us to not take life for granted.

The Survivor Tree

The Survivor Tree was at the site of the original World Trade Center. It was found in October of 2001 still alive. It was nursed back to health and still survives today. While it’s inanimate, the strength of this tree is an inspiration to us all. Through the worst of tragedies, we can still overcome and survive anything.

I wanted to post the video of Mayor Rudy Giuliani’s opening of Saturday Night Live after the 9/11 attacks, but couldn’t find it. As a St. Louisan and a huge St. Louis Cardinals fan, I have chosen to post the video of legendary Cardinal’s announcer, Jack Buck and the poem he read at Busch Stadium to commemorate the events of September 11, 2001 days later when baseball resumed.

Since this nation was founded under God,
more than 200 years ago,
We have been the bastion of freedom,
the light that keeps the free world aglow.

We do not covet the possessions of others;
We are blessed with the bounty we share.
We have rushed to help other nations;
anything…anytime…anywhere.

War is just not our nature,
We won’t start but we will end the fight.
If we are involved,
We shall be resolved,
To protect what we know is right.

We have been challenged by a cowardly foe,
Who strikes and then hides from our view.
With one voice we say,
“We have no choice today,
There is only one thing to do.”

Everyone is saying the same thing and praying,
That we end these senseless moments we are living.
As our fathers did before,
We shall win this unwanted war,

And our children will enjoy the future we’ll be giving.

*Excerpts courtesy of my travel blog. More information on my trip to Ground Zero can be found here.

FOX News Bullies the Transgendered Community

Bradley Manning has let it be known that he wants to be now known as a ‘she’ and she wants to be referred to as ‘Chelsea.’ I’ve debated how to respond to her recent revelation. I am going to withhold my opinion until a time in which I can respectfully express my opinion while considering the true matter of transgenderism. I’m not in a place to say whether Chelsea Manning is transgender. I’m not in a place to deny her what she truly believes she feels. Regardless of whether I think she’s guilty or innocent, a heroine, or a treasonist, I’m not in her head. Who you are as an individual is inside of you.

I remember learning the golden rule as a child. I’ve carried the golden rule into adulthood, and I still carry that rule as my own mantra. You treat others as you want to be treated. You can treat me as the worst person on this Earth, but I will treat you with the utmost respect, because that’s how I want to be treated. I hold Martin Luther King, Jr.’s words, “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character,” to heart. The only difference is I will replace ‘the color of their skin’ with, “what makes you different from me.” Being transgender doesn’t define Chelsea Manning’s character. What defines her character is what she did.

In a world when we need to find resolutions to bullying, in a world when we need to let people know bullying isn’t “cool,” we have FOX News. I don’t like to harp on FOX News, because being gay already comes with the stigma of being a liberal, and automatically dismissing that channel. People will say I’m being harsh towards FOX News, because I’m gay. For those that think that, I invite you to follow me as I talk about what I feel about Chelsea Manning’s transition, and what I have to say about the midterm elections and the elections of 2016. I’ll defy your expectations. I’m not cutting FOX News down simply because I’m gay. I’m being critical about FOX News, because they’re promoting bullying. They can think whatever they want about homosexuality and transgenderism. I might have a problem with what they think, and I might call them on it. This isn’t a matter of what they think, but a matter of their bullying. In a recent advertisement for their next segment after a commercial break, FOX and Friends made a blunder. They chose to play Aerosmith’s “Dude (Looks Like a Lady)” while showing a picture of Pfc. Bradley Manning on the left and an unflattering photo of Chelsea Manning on the right.

Their choice of music doesn’t just demean Chelsea Manning, but it denigrates those that identify as transgender. Instead of choosing to talk about a story in which they likely disagreed with, they chose to make fun of those that identify as transgender. As the voice of the conservative movement, they should be ashamed of themselves. FOX News is promoting bullying when they should be an upstanding news agency discussing the news.

I Have a Dream

I debated for the last week or so about how I wanted to commemorate the 50th anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” speech in Washington. I didn’t want to make it too political, but I didn’t want us to think we can’t still be motivated by his words as people in the gay community. I have chosen to post his speech in it’s entirety. I don’t want to take away from the message he made that day, but I want anyone, regardless of their own struggle will think of the inspiration that came from this speech, and the inspiration that was Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

I know a lot of people are using the hashtag #DreamDay on Twitter, so I’ll leave you with what my dream is. I dream of a day when people won’t be judged by who they love, but by the way they love.

“I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation.

Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.

But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languishing in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. So we have come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.

In a sense we have come to our nation’s capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked “insufficient funds.” But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. So we have come to cash this check — a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice. We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quick sands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God’s children.
It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro’s legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. Those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. There will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.

But there is something that I must say to my people who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice. In the process of gaining our rightful place we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred.

We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force. The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to a distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. They have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom. We cannot walk alone.

As we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead. We cannot turn back. There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, “When will you be satisfied?” We can never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the victim of the unspeakable horrors of police brutality. We can never be satisfied, as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the Negro’s basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as our children are stripped of their selfhood and robbed of their dignity by signs stating “For Whites Only”. We cannot be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until justice rolls down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream.

I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. Some of you have come from areas where your quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive.

Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed. Let us not wallow in the valley of despair.

I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.”

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

This is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to the South with. With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

This will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with a new meaning, “My country, ’tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim’s pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring.”

And if America is to be a great nation this must become true. So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania!

Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado!

Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California!

But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia!

Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee!

Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, “Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!” – Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Aug 28, 1963

 

What’s your dream?

 

The Republican Party Attempts to Silence Dissenting Opinions

It is by no means a secret that the “Fair and Balanced” network of FOX News is only fair and balanced towards the Republican party and that MSNBC’s motto of “Lean Forward” should read more like “Lean Left.” Both networks are the cheerleading branch of their respective parties and they aren’t exactly known for being unbiased. Last Friday, the Republican National Committee (RNC) headed by Reince Priebus unanimously voted to stop NBC News and CNN from hosting any presidential debates in 2016.

For those that are unaware, Reince Priebus went on a media blitz over the last few weeks to let it be known that the RNC would be voting to admonish CNN and NBC News for their planned documentaries portraying the political life of former Secretary of State, Hillary Rodham Clinton. While I understand the Republican Party’s discomfort towards two media outlets discussing the life of Hillary Rodham Clinton, the current presumptive nominee for the 2016 democratic presidential nominee, I cannot ignore the measures the Republican Party has taken to silence those supporting these documentaries.

Reince Priebus, RNC Chairman

The party’s unanimous vote to ban CNN and NBC News from hosting Republican presidential debates in 2016 isn’t a matter of saying, “We don’t support CNN and NBC Entertainment broadcasting these pieces.” It boils down to the fact that the Republican Party is pressuring two organizations into dismantling their proposed documentaries. I want to emphasize that these proposed programs have not had scripts put together yet, NBC News and NBC Entertainment are two different entities, and the RNC has no idea how the documentaries would portray Clinton. People can argue the documentaries would be biased towards Hillary Rodham Clinton, but at this early stage it’s not known how she would be portrayed. If CNN and NBC Entertainment cave to Reince Priebus’s call to disband these proposed documentaries, they are empowering both major political parties to begin controlling what television networks write and produce. I’m not some crazy conspiracy theorist that thinks this call for a boycott of CNN and NBC News is going to create censorship, I’m simply saying it will empower political parties to take steps to pressure others to only say party endorsed views.

Hillary Rodham Clinton

Do you know the saying, “Call a spade a spade?” Well, I staunchly believe in that saying. Reince Priebus and the Republican National Committee are hypocrites. While Priebus was on his media blitz drumming up support for this proposed CNN and NBC News boycott, he completely ignored the fact that FOX was planning to produce the NBC Entertainment’s miniseries. Not once did Preibus put pressure on FOX to discontinue their support for the miniseries. Why was it OK for FOX to be involved, but not CNN and NBC? It must be because FOX News portrays the Republican Party in the way Priebus and his cronies want them to be. FOX recently announced they are discontinuing their production of the proposed miniseries. This announcement came after it surfaced that FOX was helping in the productions.

I understand the RNC’s worry and anger over these proposed documentaries. If I was a member of the RNC, I would be speaking out against the CNN documentary and NBC Entertainment miniseries, but I would not be taking votes to silence  two news agencies. I don’t believe in censorship in most circumstances. If the Republican Party wants to rebrand themselves as being in touch with the general American public, they must accept dissenting opinions and counter those opinions with their own opinions and their own facts. They cannot shut it down. Their recent vote will only show how they are out of touch with the American public. If they continue down this path, it won’t bode well for them in 2014 or 2016. The Republican Party must accept dissenting opinions.

Help Fund “Traditional Marriage” Proponents – Go See Ender’s Game

The interest people have in science fiction has always eluded me. I have always had a hard time wrapping my head around worlds, characters and events that could never happen in real life. For me I have to watch a movie or read a book and think it could happen. Sci-fi was too unbelievable with me and I’ve had a difficult time getting into most story lines. That was until my recreational reading teacher handed by Orson Scott Card’s science fiction novel, Ender’s Game during my freshman year of high school. Ender’s Game was the first book I really got into that I enjoyed. I recently found out the Orson Scott Card’s novel was going to be turned into a Hollywood movie that is slated to be released in November of this year. I was excited about it until I got on my homepage of WordPress and saw a blog post by Queer Landia titled, “Boycott called for upcoming movie “Ender’s Game”, Orson Scott Card begs for tolerance.” At first I thought the call for a boycott was probably blowing something out of proportion. I was shocked on the other side of the link.

Orson Scott Card

Orson Scott Card has a long history of speaking out against equality for gay people. He wrote an article entitled, “The Hypocrites of Homosexuality,” letting people know that you can’t be a Mormon and be a gay person. Card also encouraged states to keep laws on the books criminalizing same-sex love. A proponent of ex-gay therapy, he believes that being gay is a result of molestation and abuse as children and refutes the idea that there is a biological basis for same-sex attraction. Just last year he called same-sex attraction a “reproductive dysfunction.” Not only is Card one of the largest financial donors to the National Organization of Marriage, or NOM, Card became a board member on the organizations board of directors in 2009.

Shortly after the California Supreme Court declared a law banning same-sex marriage to be unconstitutional, Card took to the media again announcing his disgust with the court’s ruling in, “Orson Scott Card: State job is not to redefine marriage.” While I am struggling with not critiquing his article, I did want to point out some interesting things he said just five years ago. Card implied that a gay relationship is nothing more than a friendship. What struck me the most was Card’s extremist portrait about what he will do if the government backs marriage equality. He wrote;

“Regardless of law, marriage has only one definition, and any government that attempts to change it is my mortal enemy. I will act to destroy that government and bring it down…”

I am deeply disappointed in the extreme stance Card has taken in terms of homosexuality through the years. I was looking forward to seeing the movie Ender’s Game, but I won’t be seeing the movie any time soon, if ever at all. I refuse to give a person, business or organization one cent of my money or patronage when I know my financial support will be funneled into anti-gay movement that fight to make me a lesser citizen than another, I cannot rest easy in that fact.

An online forum, Geek Out is now asking people to ‘Skip Ender’s Game.’ While any individual certainly has the right to see the movie if they so choose, I feel it is important to let them know their money will finance Olson Scott Card’s continuing attack on marriage equality and help fund the National Organization for Marriage. With the news of a call to boycott Ender’s Game, Olson Scott Card attempted to paint those that are choosing to boycott his film as intolerant. He recently wrote:

“Ender’s Game” is set more than a century in the future and has nothing to do with political issues that did not exist when the book was written in 1984.

With the recent Supreme Court ruling, the gay marriage issue becomes moot. The Full Faith and Credit clause of the Constitution will, sooner or later, give legal force in every state to any marriage contract recognized by any other state.

Now it will be interesting to see whether the victorious proponents of gay marriage will show tolerance toward those who disagreed with them when the issue was still in dispute.”

Pot meet the kettle. It’s downright wrong to believe the gay rights movement didn’t exist in 1984 and that the issue of gay marriage is now a moot point because of the recent Supreme Court’s ruling. The fight for marriage equality is far from over.

Tyler Coates

Not everyone in the LGBT community is supportive of Geek Out’s boycott. Tyler Coates, known for his portrayal as the non-stereotypical “Disappointing Gay Best Friend,” recently wrote about why the gay community should not boycott Ender’s Game. Do you agree with him?

There is an array of information on the Internet supporting the claim that Card is a staunch supporter of everything not gay. I hope that you will consider taking a stand against this vitriole and say no to Card’s staunchly anti-gay sentiments. As people give him their money through movie sales, Card will use that money against our causes. We cannot allow that to happen. Will you still plan to see Orson Scott Card’s Ender’s Game?

I leave you with one final question. Will Mike Huckabee sponsor a day at the movies?